August 31st, 2005



I've been watching tv and listening to NPR and getting more and more depressed. Those poor people, the homeless and the dead and the old people who must be so disoriented. At first, when no one really knew how bad it was, tv covered some of the animal stories like the seal washed up on a road but still alive. Not anymore. I haven't heard anyone on tv even mention the animals, I expect they think people will be irate if they mention the loss of animal life when there's so much human suffering. I'm not so sure of that, but at any rate there's no mention of how many of the corpses floating in the water are animals and how many are human.

It's tempting to blame the victims and say they were stupid not to get out when they could but I wonder what I would have done in their place. If I didn't have a car and no one to go to, just a shelter somewhere where I wouldn't be allowed out until the authorities let me out. And if I had animals? How could I just leave them? If the only thing I had maybe was the shack I lived in?

And then to add to my depression over total strangers I'm pretty sure that Chuck's father will die before Christmas. No matter how many people I lose I doubt I will ever be able to accept their deaths as natural and just part of life. It just isn't something I can accept, especially knowing that I'll never see them again. And feeling like there's no way I can help anyone except maybe Chuck. But at least I can try and I remember how much it meant to me when anyone was kind or showed that they cared.
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